AKA Does Anyone Know if I Should Order Dinner for My Children from the Seat of an Outback Toilet? I’m sitting here watching a series on Netflix called Very British Problems. The episode in question is discussing how to deal with other human beings; such as what is and isn’t acceptable and how discomfiting any… Continue reading Outback Etiquette
Lessons come from the most unlikely places. Like from children and applesauce. And crack. Sometimes from manky, infected toes and bubblewrap, but that's another story altogether. Today’s lesson is courtesy of applesauce and crack and I don't really know how I feel about it all. Ash, eating applesauce straight from the jar. “It's Apples Mum.… Continue reading There’s always a bright side. Even if that bright side is that you only lost a finger.
So here’s the thing. People keep putting me in charge of stuff and I can’t work out why. No, really. Managers are supposed to be fully functioning adults and if we have learned anything on this blog, we know I am not a fully functioning anything. I used to be Assistant Manager at a refuge… Continue reading WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP TRUSTING ME TO DO THINGS? IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE!
I’ve decided I’m a genius. No reason other than the fact that geniuses... geni-i... people who possess the smarts are often unappreciated in their life time. And I am unappreciated. Ergo I must be a genius. Flawless logic really when you think about it. Artists are the same. So I’m probably an artist too. Save… Continue reading Perhaps I am the Prime Minister of Australia. Only Time Will Tell.
I have decided that aardvarks are much underused in the rock video. There should be more of them. I would like to see more aardvarks and less Karadashians. You rock that casbah, Mr Clash. Save Save
Conversation with my daughter bourne out of possible swine flu and too much cough syrup “Bekah, if I die, I want you to avenge my death by becoming a world famous scientist and waging war on all the bacteria and viruses in the world.” “Okay, Mummy” <I walk off content in the knowledge my daughter… Continue reading She Really Sucks at Teamwork
Dear Sir/Madam/possible inheritor of $5,000,000 from a Ugandan Prince Do you ever have those days where your creativity feels stifled in your windowless, soulless, office? Do you feel like you need light to grow and thrive? Like a tree? I am a tree trapped in a box with no soul. Sometimes you just need… Continue reading I am a tree. Or a poor imitation of a circus clown. Hard to tell which. Help me please.
Or My Train of Thought Has Derailed My train of thought whilst standing in the shower: My life has become less funny and more grown up. I think it is attitude really. I need to start viewing my life as a series of stories to be told again. Like the time that my washing machine… Continue reading It is confusing living in my head
The other day I got a phone call that amused me for the rest of the day. To be honest, as I sit here telling you about it, I’m still pretty amused at myself. My job can get a little monotonous and sometimes I’m just looking for small ways to keep myself smiling. Things to… Continue reading Do not ship puppies interstate, but if you do make sure you put a sandwich in the box
Admin’s Log: July 15 It has been 5 weeks since Telstra pulled the copper lines out of the street where I work leaving us with no phone or internet service until we could hook up to the NBN. As it stands we have no phone lines out, calls have been diverted to my mobile so… Continue reading It’s a Trap!